I found Jamie’s poem quite interesting and thought I’ll write a response to it this week. There were some very well written lines and I especially liked the lines ‘They wait patiently/ for just one more./ It’s always one more/ of my venomous concoctions / that reek of death.’ We do not usually give much attention to the bartender and I think she did a very good job to portray the gravity of the role a bartender plays. I also liked the different imagery she used, but I also sort of felt it was a bit too much at times, especially the use of witchcraft, vampires, and werewolves in the same poem. I think that if she wants to keep all the imagery, she should work on trying to tie in the imagery a bit better, which I feel will help the poem flow better. I actually liked her earlier draft bartender better, but I can see where she is trying to go with this new revision and if she works on it a bit more, I think she’ll come up with something brilliant!
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